When people ask you how you’re doing – have you every included the word “busy” in your answer?
One NY Times article called “The Busy Trap” that went viral commented, “It’s become the default response when you ask anyone how they’re doing: “Busy!” “So busy.” “Crazy busy.””
Notice it isn’t generally people pulling back-to-back shifts in the I.C.U. or commuting by bus to three minimum-wage jobs who tell you how busy they are; what those people are is not busy but tired. Exhausted. Dead on their feet. It’s almost always people whose lamented busyness is purely self-imposed: work and obligations they’ve taken on voluntarily, classes and activities they’ve “encouraged” their kids to participate in. They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or anxiety, because they’re addicted to busyness and dread what they might have to face in its absence.
Yes, for most of us, busyness is a choice, and we kind of like it!
But what are its consequences?
One psychiatrist listed a few:
It is so easy with cellphones and BlackBerrys a touch away.
It is a kind of high.
It is a status symbol.
We’re afraid we’ll be left out if we slow down.
We avoid dealing with life’s really big issues — death, global warming, AIDS, terrorism — by running from task to task.
We do not know how not to be busy.
There are many, but we’ll focus today on the consequence for our neighbours, since Jesus said this was so important.
When I first moved to Ajax, it naturally took a little time to meet all our neighbours. Most memorably, two distinct families said the same thing when they met us. One said, “I’m really sorry we’re just meeting you, I had made cakepops for you guys, but then got too busy to bring them over.” Another said the same thing, “my wife was going to bake a pie to welcome you, but we got too busy.”
It’s heartbreaking – firstly because I could have had some excellent desserts, but also because it’s obvious how hectic our lifestyles can be, and how it inhibits forming lifegiving relationships.
Question: On a scale from 1 to 10 how busy is your life right now?
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In this series on being great neighbours, that ends this week, we’ve looked at 6 shifts:
Stranger -> Neighbour -> Acquaintance -> Partner -> Friend -> Family
We’ve encouraged you to learn neighbours’ names, stories, work together, become friends, and now your challenge is to find people of peace in your life. Start sharing Redeem the Commute with them. Perhaps you could do the Marriage course with your spouse and some other couples. Or you could do the parenting courses with other parents. Then take Christianity 101 together, and then the daily challenges. Make a habit of eating together whenever you can, and talking about things that matter.
This is our vision, to be a network of small groups who are being the church. We don’t want to be a church you go to, but a church on the go. We don’t want you to just go to church, but to be the church every day. We’ll be the church when we are scattered around the GTA at work, and scattered around our various neighbourhoods, but also when we gather for community events. We started this with our outdoor movie night, and next we have a trivia night.
After that, we’ll have a Christmas event. We want it to be welcoming for local residents and families, generous for those in need, and introduces the story of the original Christmas party. We’re about to start planning, so let Ryan know if you would like to help!
In the next series, Becoming Like Family, we’ll look at what it means for you, and perhaps your own immediate family to be part of God’s family, called the church. See you there!
Challenge: Ask your person of peace for help with the party you’re planning. Then invite them to follow challenges, or another course, with you.
