When people ask you how you’re doing – have you every included the word “busy” in your answer?

One NY Times article called “The Busy Trap” that went viral commented, “It’s become the default response when you ask anyone how they’re doing: “Busy!” “So busy.” “Crazy busy.””

Notice it isn’t generally people pulling back-to-back shifts in the I.C.U. or commuting by bus to three minimum-wage jobs  who tell you how busy they are; what those people are is not busy but tired. Exhausted. Dead on their feet. It’s almost always people whose lamented busyness is purely self-imposed: work and obligations they’ve taken on voluntarily, classes and activities they’ve “encouraged” their kids to participate in. They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or anxiety, because they’re addicted to busyness and dread what they might have to face in its absence.

Yes, for most of us, busyness is a choice, and we kind of like it!

But what are its consequences?

One psychiatrist listed a few:

  • It is so easy with cellphones and BlackBerrys a touch away.
  • It is a kind of high.
  • It is a status symbol.
  • We’re afraid we’ll be left out if we slow down.
  • We avoid dealing with life’s really big issues — death, global warming, AIDS, terrorism — by running from task to task.
  • We do not know how not to be busy.

There are many, but we’ll focus today on the consequence for our neighbours, since Jesus said this was so important.

When I first moved to Ajax, it naturally took a little time to meet all our neighbours.  Most memorably, two distinct families said the same thing when they met us.  One said, “I’m really sorry we’re just meeting you, I had made cakepops for you guys, but then got too busy to bring them over.”  Another said the same thing, “my wife was going to bake a pie to welcome you, but we got too busy.”

It’s heartbreaking – firstly because I could have had some excellent desserts, but also because it’s obvious how hectic our lifestyles can be, and how it inhibits forming lifegiving relationships.

Question: On a scale from 1 to 10 how busy is your life right now?

Ryan Sim - July 1, 2013

Monday - A New Idea - Knowing

Sermon on the Mount

We'll look this week at the difference between knowing someone, and knowing about someone. We'll use celebrity stalking cases to illustrate this. One person was obsessed with Sheryl Crow, sneaking backstage to meet her and calling her his “spiritual twin.” A pizza delivery man was convicted of stalking actress Gwyneth Paltrow. Like many stalkers, he tried to reach her by going to the home of her parents. One was stalking Mel Gibson…claimed that god told him to pray with Gibson, and that’s all he was trying to do. Another was obsessed with tennis star Anna Kournikova. He decided that if he took off all his clothes, swam across Biscayne Bay to her house, climbed up on her deck and shouted, “Anna, save me!” he’d win her heart. He executed the plan perfectly except for one tiny mistake — he swam to the wrong house, was arrested and sent to a psychiatric institution. This would have been terrifying for the real people being stalked. But despite that we are tempted to laugh, because the stories are so far from reality we know. What they have in common is that these people think they know these celebrities, and can help them, love them. Some will memorize every stat about an athlete, an actor’s every appearance in film and television, and obscure facts. They know all about someone, but don’t know them, even if they think they do or should. We asked people on the street if they ever met someone famous, and if that person was like they expected. Question: Have you ever met someone after years of learning about them? How was it different? What’s the difference between knowing about someone, and knowing them?

Related Topics: God, Knowing | More Messages from Ryan Sim | Download Audio

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