It seems like every sitcom shares a feature: friends just come and go, they seldom knock or call first. Think of Friends – the characters simply came and went. You might think Seinfeld was an exception, with George and Elaine buzzing from the lobby, but don’t forget how Jerry’s neighbour Kramer just tumbles in the door. I’m sure to some degree this is about writing a good script – you can’t have a lot of down time waiting for people to answer the doorbell. But it also communicates something about the depth of their friendship.
Some researchers say these kinds of friends have what’s called refrigerator rights. The term comes from a book of the same name, but you may have heard it in pop culture, too. It defines a close relationship, where even though they don’t live there, a friend is able to come and go at will, and even eat from the other’s fridge without asking. It’s a high level of friendship.
For some people, maybe that seems natural enough. You grew up with it, perhaps. But for others, it bothers you. You might think it’s awkward, too intimate, or too trusting. You might ask, “What if I needed those leftovers for lunch tomorrow? What if that dessert was for a party? What if you come in my house while I’m in the shower, sleeping, or arguing with my spouse?”
The lines between family and friend are starting to blur in that kind of relationship. That’s the shift we’re going to explore this week in our pursuit of becoming great neighbours. We’ll look at the relationships with our neighbours that go deepest – where we become like family, with a focused, high level of friendship.
Question: How do you react to people having “refrigerator rights” in your house? Would you love more relationships that close, or are you a bit nervous?
Loading Content...
Share a Link to this Message
The link has been copied to your clipboard; paste it anywhere you would like to share it.
This week we’re trying to see the difference between a follower of Jesus, and someone else, in terms of how we see and use money.
Maybe you’ve seen a video going around the Internet with Kevin O’Leary, of Dragon’s Den, saying it’s just fantastic that the richest 85 people in the world have as much wealth as the 3.5 billion poorest. He says it’s fantastic because it will inspire the poor to get rich themselves.
We’ve attached it if you’d like to watch.
The Bible thinks quite differently about the relationship between rich and poor, in the passage that immediately follows what we read yesterday:
As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life. (1 Timothy 6:17-19 ESV)
Paul uses the same language Jesus is known for using – he refers to storing up treasure in heaven.
When we are generous, sharing with those in need, we are actually doing something of real value and eternal value that Paul calls a good foundation for the future. That is truly life. When others hoard, they are missing the point. They are living a false life with limited value and longevity.
Finding that balance is of course always hard. How much is enough to gain, save, and give? Yesterday’s reading set a low bar: But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.
I have always liked a sermon preached by John Wesley centuries ago on the topic of money, that could be summed up as: Gain all you can, save all you can, give all you can. In isolation, each part would bring destruction, but together they make sense. You have to make money to be generous, but if you pursue making too much, you will crash or lose faith. You also have to save money to give money – wisely spending to have some left over, and by having stability in order to help others.
Question: How else do you think a follower of Jesus looks at money differently from someone else? How does gaining/saving/giving all you can impact retirement, debt, etc. Why?
When our computers get bogged down and unmanageable, we know to hit a reset button to simply start over. Wouldn't a reset button be great in life? We know it would be complicated, with all our responsibilities and routines to consider, but imagine the freedom and refreshment of a new start in life! What would you do differently? What would you pay more attention to, and what would you ignore? How would you avoid getting bogged down and broken again?
The great news is, in coming to earth as Jesus Christ, God has begun to "reset" our universe, our world, and even us. We're invited to start over with him, in what he calls his kingdom. We're invited to start a new life with a clean slate.
What gets wiped clean, and lived differently, when God resets our lives? We'll explore how God resets these key areas of our lives:
Reset: Goals
Reset: Time
Reset: Money
Reset: Work
Reset: Body & Food
Reset: Sex & Marriage
Reset: Family
Reset: Compassion
Reset: Nature
Reset: Society
Reset: Death
Join us for the next several weeks, and invite God to reset your life.
