We’re recently started a new series called “reset”. Last week, we talked about how Jesus makes it possible to reset all of life, giving us a fresh start in life that impacts every key area. We’re going to look at many of these in depth, starting this week with how Jesus resets our goals.
When my wife and I were having our first baby, we were encouraged to write birth plan. This is where you write down a plan for who’s in the room, and make choices about everything from epidurals to breastfeeding to how bright the lights should be.
I know someone who works closely with an OB, and she has some wild stories about how people let some of the small choices get in the way of the big picture. In a perfect, routine childbirth, a parent’s ideal may be to have the lights just so, no pain with no drugs, and a favourite song playing at the exact moment the child is born.
But when things don’t go perfectly, there are some people who forget the point, or the goal. They start to argue for their personal preferences, instead of arguing for a baby’s health.
When my wife and I were writing up a birth plan, we decided to stay goal focused. The goal was to have a healthy child. All our personal preferences, hopes and dreams for the birth experience were going to be expressed, but we’d drop them in an instant if things were going wrong.
That was a moment we reset our goals…to make sure they were focused on the right thing. It’s not a bad thing in life to regularly reset our goals, and ensure we’re focused on the right ones. Not just in childbirth.
We can get so bogged down in day to day tasks we forget the point in our careers. Do we live to work, or work to live?
I heard a TED Talk (attached) that shared the job description of a hospital janitor. It was what you’d expect – mop, clean, scrub, restock. It had nothing at all to do with hospital patients and healthcare. But some psychologists interviewed hospital janitors. They met one who told them about how he stopped mopping the floor because a patient was walking slowly down the hall. Another told them how she ignored her supervisor and didn’t vacuum the visitor’s lounge because there were some family members who were there all day, every day.
In the drudgery of cleaning, these janitors remembered the real goal of the hospital, and perhaps even of their human race. They reset their goals to be about more than cleaning, but about caring for others.
Question: When have you had to reset your goals? Why did you do it?
Reminder: We are reading the Bible in sync as one community – so check out today’s reading here.
Reminder: The best way to grow spiritually this year is to join our Christianity 101 in the Cafe Course in Pickering starting this Wednesday, January 22nd. Register for you and a friend today!
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It seems like every sitcom shares a feature: friends just come and go, they seldom knock or call first. Think of Friends – the characters simply came and went. You might think Seinfeld was an exception, with George and Elaine buzzing from the lobby, but don’t forget how Jerry’s neighbour Kramer just tumbles in the door. I’m sure to some degree this is about writing a good script – you can’t have a lot of down time waiting for people to answer the doorbell. But it also communicates something about the depth of their friendship.
Some researchers say these kinds of friends have what’s called refrigerator rights. The term comes from a book of the same name, but you may have heard it in pop culture, too. It defines a close relationship, where even though they don’t live there, a friend is able to come and go at will, and even eat from the other’s fridge without asking. It’s a high level of friendship.
For some people, maybe that seems natural enough. You grew up with it, perhaps. But for others, it bothers you. You might think it’s awkward, too intimate, or too trusting. You might ask, “What if I needed those leftovers for lunch tomorrow? What if that dessert was for a party? What if you come in my house while I’m in the shower, sleeping, or arguing with my spouse?”
The lines between family and friend are starting to blur in that kind of relationship. That’s the shift we’re going to explore this week in our pursuit of becoming great neighbours. We’ll look at the relationships with our neighbours that go deepest – where we become like family, with a focused, high level of friendship.
Question: How do you react to people having “refrigerator rights” in your house? Would you love more relationships that close, or are you a bit nervous?
