Hi, welcome to Redeem the Commute. I’m Ryan, your host of the Daily Challenges. Today’s Wednesday, so it’s the day we try to let our thoughts be challenged and transformed by the words of the Bible that we saw yesterday.
We’re exploring how following Jesus resets our views of sex and marriage, using a passage from the Bible where the author, Paul, related misuse of food with misuse of sex. To justify unlimited sexual freedom, people will say, things like: Sex is a natural part of life. We have a need for sexual release, just like a need for food and water. I just need to meet the right person, be sexually compatible with someone, to find fulfillment.
To say that, we have to separate our physical selves from our spiritual selves, and God didn’t design them to be divided. Paul makes it very clear, our bodies are not just a throwaway container for our souls, but they are part and parcel of who we are as God’s creations. God didn’t create us as souls with containers, but as human beings…all in one.
The Corinthian Christians he wrote were those who committed to intentionally practicing life in God’s kingdom, even while they are still in this world. That’s what makes them Christians, they are followers of Jesus, and members of a church community.
When the Corinthians decided to be Christians, to follow Jesus and reconnect with God through his power rather than their own, they weren’t just making a decision that impacted their souls, but that impacted every part of who they were, bodies included.
Paul goes so far as to say they are joined with Christ…not just in some spiritual sense, but in a way so physical, tangible and real that he says if they go and join their bodies with a prostitute…it’s like they have joined Christ with a prostitute.
That is a clear image that our bodies matter, the physical reality of sex matters as much as the spiritual aspect, and so following Jesus naturally means trying to view sexuality in light of God’s kingdom plans, rather than our own plans.
So what did God make sex for? What limits did he give, or what boundaries did he lay out? It might surprise you. Here is what comes after yesterday’s reading from 1 Corinthians:
7 Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. 8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
See how Paul views marriage and celibacy as “containers” for sexuality.
First, he encourages people to be celibate like him. Recognizes that’s hard, but full devotion to God’s kingdom is what he’s all about, and why many have chosen celibacy like him. In a culture obsessed with sex, like our own, this is a clear way to signal that sex is not a god to be worshipped, it is not our identity, it is not all that our culture says it is.
For those who can’t be celibate, Paul gives a backup option of marriage. Most people assume that Christian teaching is entirely pro-marriage, but Paul only suggests it as a backup to celibacy!
Even within marriage, Paul makes clear there are God-given limits to sexual expression. Sex isn’t to be selfish, you give up authority over your body. Sex isn’t to be abusive, either. Sex, or depriving of sex, isn’t to be used to control someone. Sex isn’t to be the only reason for the relationship, the spouses should be able to stop for prayer. Yes, prayer is more important, another clear way for Paul to communicate that sex isn’t meant to be the ultimate goal in life, or our source of meaning – God is.
Question: Whether you’re married or not, how does this lens of having been reset in Christ change your views of marriage and sex? Does it challenge our culture’s view?
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Jesus’ description of God as a loving, caring father who wants to provide for our needs, not necessarily our wants, means that God answers prayer in one three ways: Yes, No, Later
Most of us are happy when God says Yes to our prayers, although you should be warned that sometimes we get more than we bargained for when God says yes to our prayers, because the yes may lead to consequences we could never have imagined. So sometimes in a clear, and often dramatic way, God will say Yes to our prayers. We asked to hear Redeem the Commute stories, and the very day that someone prayed about that, we heard Jason’s story.
But sometimes God will say no for a variety of reasons. Our prayers may have the wrong motives, like “drop dead prayers”. Prayers for revenge, fame and fortune rarely get answered with the word yes.
Sometimes we are praying for simply frivolous things. “Lord please give us a sunny day for a soccer match”---when the local farmers are praying for rain. Sometimes God says no because we are requesting what is not good for us, and we can’t even see it. God loves us and knows what it is best for us.
Yesterday: Good parents do not always give their children what they ask for. If a 4 year old asks to play with the knives a good parent says no. By answering every prayer Yes, God would in effect abdicate, turning the world over to us to run. History shows how we have handled the limited freedom granted to us: genocide, wars, polluted the earth, concentrated pockets of wealth and grinding poverty.
God will answer no if the things we ask for are either not good in themselves, or not good for us, or good for others, either immediately or ultimately. Ruth Graham (Billy Graham’s wife) tells a story “God has not always granted my requests. If he had I would have married the wrong man, several times.
Awful things happen in world – like Oklahoma tornadoes. Some were praying in that moment of terror or death. Some people are still alive, and were not praying. Exactly how God answers prayer is a mystery. All that we say today about prayer must be said with all humility because at some point we stand back and respect and bow our heads before the mystery of prayer, especially the mystery of hearing the word No.
Later is of course a combination of Yes and No. Yes, but not now. No for now, but yes for later. And of course what we may perceive as a no right now, is in fact a later. Sometimes no and later can in hindsight be a great blessing, that only makes sense in hindsight.
Question: Since prayers can be answered in these three ways, how do you think Jesus wants his followers to pray?
