Forgiveness IS NOT
• demanding a person changes before we forgive them
• pretending it doesn't matter and trying to forget about it
• thinking time alone will heal the hurt
Forgiveness IS
• facing the wrong done to us
• recognizing the emotions inside
• releasing the other person into God's hands, leaving the consequences to Him
• choosing not to hold it against our husband or wife
If we do not forgive we'll be the one imprisoned by the bitterness, resentment, and anger
Forgiveness is a process-we often need to keep forgiving for the same hurt-sometimes on a daily basis
God forgives us freely and therefore we must forgive each other freely
Start Again Together:
• begin each day with a fresh start and no backlog-tear off each page of the notebook
• don't expect healing to be instant-apology and forgiveness remove the distance between us but the hurt leaves a bruising that needs time to heal
• re-build trust by setting aside marriage time, and being gentle and kind towards each other
• pray for one another-pray aloud or silently, asking God to heal your partner of the hurt you have caused him or her
This process is like a drain that carries away the hurt
Confession to God and those we hurt, together with forgiving those who have hurt us, must become a daily habit if intimacy is to be maintained. Otherwise the drain begins to block up with unresolved hurt and anger.
Question:Ask your husband or wife to tell you one way that you can support them this week. If you feel comfortable, pray for each other – aloud or silently. Otherwise express your support in some other way.
Question 2:Complete the Worksheet found under "Study Guide"
never too soon to start (see the account of John the Baptist in the womb in Luke 1:44, The Bible)
never too late to start (see the Parable of the Lost Son in Luke 15: 11-24, The Bible)
turn fears and longings into prayers
when to pray:
with them before they go to sleep
teaching them to pray (thank you, sorry, please)
on our own
with others
in traffic jams or when cleaning up or ironing
when prompted (often at moments of potential danger or temptation for our child)
everyday
what to pray for:
friendships
schools
their health
their safety
their marriage partner (most children will marry one day and their marriage partner may well already be alive somewhere)
their response to God’s love
their characters – use the fruit of the Spirit as a list to pray through: love. joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (see Galatians 5: 22-23, The Bible)
pray with them, particularly at bedtime
pray for yourselves as parents
Take some time to pray for your child(ren), and plan to make it a regular routine. Our Christianity 101 Course may help you explore the topic of prayer, God and Christianity in more depth.
