Marriage Course - September 14, 2012

Day 28 - Understanding Anger

Marriage

Reactions to hurt

1. Anger
• some are like rhinos-they attack when provoked
• some are like hedgehogs-they withdraw when threatened

2. Retaliation
• to let our partner know what the hurt felt like

3. Fear
• we withdraw so as not to be hurt again

4. Guilt
• hurt will always be caused by both partners

Question:Identify whether you are a rhino or hedgehog. If you're not sure, ask your partner.

From Series: "Marriage"

Study Guide

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  • we all listen through filters but often we are unaware of them
  • when someone is speaking, our own memories, attitudes, prejudices, physical environment, lack of interest, etc. all affect what we hear
  • some of the time we are listening more to ourselves than to the other person
  • effective communication requires us to control the conversation in our mind

Take a look at the diagram below.  What filters are, or have been, part of your usual listening process?