Forgiveness IS NOT
• demanding a person changes before we forgive them
• pretending it doesn't matter and trying to forget about it
• thinking time alone will heal the hurt
Forgiveness IS
• facing the wrong done to us
• recognizing the emotions inside
• releasing the other person into God's hands, leaving the consequences to Him
• choosing not to hold it against our husband or wife
If we do not forgive we'll be the one imprisoned by the bitterness, resentment, and anger
Forgiveness is a process-we often need to keep forgiving for the same hurt-sometimes on a daily basis
God forgives us freely and therefore we must forgive each other freely
Start Again Together:
• begin each day with a fresh start and no backlog-tear off each page of the notebook
• don't expect healing to be instant-apology and forgiveness remove the distance between us but the hurt leaves a bruising that needs time to heal
• re-build trust by setting aside marriage time, and being gentle and kind towards each other
• pray for one another-pray aloud or silently, asking God to heal your partner of the hurt you have caused him or her
This process is like a drain that carries away the hurt
Confession to God and those we hurt, together with forgiving those who have hurt us, must become a daily habit if intimacy is to be maintained. Otherwise the drain begins to block up with unresolved hurt and anger.
Question:Ask your husband or wife to tell you one way that you can support them this week. If you feel comfortable, pray for each other – aloud or silently. Otherwise express your support in some other way.
Question 2:Complete the Worksheet found under "Study Guide"
marriage more established having weathered tough times
may be teenagers in the house
emotionally the most exhausting stage of parenting
the greatest need is to support and encourage each other
Winter
empty-nest stage for many
probably fewer demands with an opportunity for more time together
can be the most exciting stage of marriage
the greatest needs are shared interests and good communication
Reflect on what you’ve heard so far. If you are in one of these seasons, talk together about the pressures you’ve worked through until now in your relationship, and the pressures you’re currently facing. If you’re not here yet, what do you think it will be like?