Parenting Children - September 20, 2012

Day 37 - Helping our children manage their anger - Older children Ages 5-10

Parenting Children Ages 0-10

• read each child’s way of showing anger
• aim to teach them "expression," rather than aggression or "suppression"
• help them to express anger appropriately (verbally and pleasantly)
• correct rudeness, destructive behavior, swearing, hitting others, etc. - without shutting them down
• allow them to express negative feelings: hurt, sadness, anger, etc.
• not allowing expression or discussion can lead to passive aggressive behavior, i.e; using negative behavior to get back at parents, such as being uncommunicative, refusing to co-operate, or being deliberately annoying
• we need to recognize if we are contributing to the problem and our child’s anger
• don't punish for being immature in expressing negative feelings

Question:
For you, what will be hardest about reacting to anger in this way? Why?

From Series: Parenting Children Ages 0-10 | More Messages from Parenting Children | Download Audio

From Series: "Parenting Children Ages 0-10"

Study Guide

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We look at the role of listening and attention-giving in effective communications.2. Learn to listen

  • treat them like young adults (not children)
  • Listen carefully to their views and feelings
  • Effective communication requires that parents
    • learn to speak with their teenager rather than at their teenager (Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages of Teenagers)
    • engage in discussion and be prepared to debate the issues rather than repeating Simplistic slogans such as “You’re too young to have a boyfriend” or “drugs are dangerous”

3. Give your full attention

  • recognize the important moments to listen and give your full attention
  • don’t try to listen to your teenager while doing something else at the same time

maintain eye contact; observe your teenager’s body language

When have you had your best conversations with your teenager?