Parenting Children - August 28, 2012

Day 16 – Love Language – One to One Time


•  our children crave to be noticed by us and crave our attention
•  special time with each child develops their self-esteem and their ability to relate to others
•  can be difficult for us as parents to recognize this need and to fulfill it
•  the more children we have, the more planning and conscious effort it takes
•  channels of communication are opened through spending one-on-one time with our child(ren)
•  can transform a child’s behavior

eye contact:
•  can be used either positively or negatively
•  children learn by modeling - if we do it, they'll do it
•  easy when they are babies - but don't give up eye contact as they get older
•  good eye contact goes hand in hand with active listening

Question:
Do you have fond memories of 1:1 time with a parent? What memories can you create with your children one on one?

From Series: Parenting Children Ages 0-10 | More Messages from Parenting Children | Download Audio

Study Guide

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We look at the role of listening and attention-giving in effective communications.2. Learn to listen

  • treat them like young adults (not children)
  • Listen carefully to their views and feelings
  • Effective communication requires that parents
    • learn to speak with their teenager rather than at their teenager (Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages of Teenagers)
    • engage in discussion and be prepared to debate the issues rather than repeating Simplistic slogans such as “You’re too young to have a boyfriend” or “drugs are dangerous”

3. Give your full attention

  • recognize the important moments to listen and give your full attention
  • don’t try to listen to your teenager while doing something else at the same time

maintain eye contact; observe your teenager’s body language

When have you had your best conversations with your teenager?