Parenting Children - August 17, 2012

Day 5 – Experiencing & Observing Healthy Relationships

Parenting Children Ages 0-10

Children learn to relate through experiencing, observing, and practicing various relationships within the family:
•  parent-child
•  mother-father
•  sibling-sibling
•  grandparent-grandchild
•  uncles, aunts, cousins, etc. Experiencing: parent-child relationship
•  children learn to love through experiencing their parents. unconditional love
•  important for children to feel accepted for who they are Our love and acceptance give our children confidence through building in them:
•  security (knowing they are loved not for what they do, but for who they are)
•  self-worth (knowing they are of value - their self-worth is based on what they think we, their parents, think of them)
•  significance (knowing there is a purpose to their lives, and that they have a worthwhile contribution to make) Ultimately security, self-worth and Significance come from God
•  we model God’s parenthood of us
•  parents are in loco dei (in His place to represent Him) Observing: mother-father (and other adult) relationships
•  children learn to relate through observing adult relationships
•  how we, their parents, speak and listen to each other
•  the physical affection we show
•  whether and how we resolve conflicts
•  children need to see firsthand the modeling of an intimate, committed adult relationship
•  if parenting together, consider doing The Marriage Course to invest in your relationship
•  if not parenting together, work at having thebest possible relationship with your child’s other parent (resolving conflict, forgiveness, consistency, etc.)

Question:
Where is your child learning most about how to build healthy relationships?

From Series: "Parenting Children Ages 0-10"

Study Guide

More From "Parenting Children Ages 0-10"

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Show an interest

  • involves effort and generosity
  • listen to what appeals to your child(ren)

Avoid shutting them down

  • value their ideas
  • allow them to express negative feelings such as disappointments, embarrassments, sadness, anxiety, and anger.

Reflect back

  • repeat back to your child what you think he or she is saying
  • reflect back to your child some of his or her words, but not in parrot fashion, as that can be annoying
  • concentrate on reflecting back the feelings you think your child is trying to express, e.g. it sounds like you feel upset or frustrated or sad?
  • reflective listening will help your child(ren) to frame their own feelings

Complete the attached worksheet.

 

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