• never too soon to start (see the account of John the Baptist in the womb in Luke 1:44, The Bible)
• never too late to start (see the Parable of the Lost Son in Luke 15: 11-24, The Bible)
• turn fears and longings into prayers
• when to pray:
o with them before they go to sleep
o teaching them to pray (thank you, sorry, please)
o on our own
o with others
o in traffic jams or when cleaning up or ironing
• when prompted (often at moments of potential danger or temptation for our child)
• everyday
what to pray for:
• friendships
• schools
• their health
• their safety
• their marriage partner (most children will marry one day and their marriage partner may well already be alive somewhere)
• their response to God's love
• their characters - use the fruit of the Spirit as a list to pray through: love. joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (see Galatians 5: 22-23, The Bible)
• pray with them, particularly at bedtime
• pray for yourselves as parents
Question: Take some time to pray for your child(ren), and plan to make it a regular routine.
some people react like a rhino – when angry, they go on the attack and express their feelings aggressively
some people react like a hedgehog – when angry, they protect themselves and bury their feelings
learning to control our anger
1. Recognize the root of our anger
HALT – ask: Am I Hungry, Anxious, Lonely or Tired?
displaced anger: buried anger caused by someone in the past can come out in the present against someone else
deal with unresolved hurt from the past through forgiveness
2. Take time out to calm down
press the pause button
avoid jumping to conclusions
3. Label the action not the child’s character
avoid phrases like “You’re so careless” or “You’re so unkind”
children can believe labels
labeling the action helps them to change, e.g.; That was a careless thing to do” or “That was an unkind remark to make”
4. Use “I” statements to express own feelings
helps us to avoid labeling other people
easier for them to respond constructively
and make changes in their behavior
Do you tend to react more like a rhino or a hedgehog? What helps you express your anger effectively? How do your children tend to react? What helps them?
