Parenting Children - September 21, 2012

Day 38 - Teaching our children to manage their anger

1. Recognize it's a long process

• typically it takes at least eighteen years!
• help them to realize that talking through an issue that has upset them is more productive than behaving badly

2, Try to find the root cause of the anger
• listen to your child
• HALT - are they Hungry, Anxious, Lonely or Tired?
• may not be easy to work out root cause - they may not know
• if we don't find the root cause, they can become angrier or suppress their emotions, leading to rebellion later
• create environment of openness and honesty to encourage communication

Question:
Complete the attached worksheet

From Series: Parenting Children Ages 0-10 | More Messages from Parenting Children | Download Audio

From Series: "Parenting Children Ages 0-10"

Study Guide

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We look at the role of listening and attention-giving in effective communications.2. Learn to listen

  • treat them like young adults (not children)
  • Listen carefully to their views and feelings
  • Effective communication requires that parents
    • learn to speak with their teenager rather than at their teenager (Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages of Teenagers)
    • engage in discussion and be prepared to debate the issues rather than repeating Simplistic slogans such as “You’re too young to have a boyfriend” or “drugs are dangerous”

3. Give your full attention

  • recognize the important moments to listen and give your full attention
  • don’t try to listen to your teenager while doing something else at the same time

maintain eye contact; observe your teenager’s body language

When have you had your best conversations with your teenager?