Marriage Course - August 24, 2012

Day 8 - Nurture Each Other

Marriage

Nurturing involves seeking to meet each other’s emotional needs for affection, encouragement, support, comfort, etc,

• we all have a longing to be loved and to be known by another
• empty space inside that needs to be filled up with love
• when empty, we feel alone or lonely giving each other emotional support refills the empty space inside
• we are made for close relationships

How to nurture
Be proactive rather than reactive:
• being reactive means focusing on each others shortcomings
• being proactive means focusing on each other’s needs
• proactive behavior draws couples together because each one feels loved; when we feel loved, we feel like loving

Study each other:
• recognize each other’s needs
• often our partner’s needs and desires will be different to our own
• discover what matters to your husband or wife. otherwise we tend to give what we like to receive.
• needs change over time
• make requests, not demands
• we can't assume our husband or wife automatically knows our desires. We must tell each other.

Question:Complete the worksheet under "Extras -> Study Guide"

From Series: "Marriage"

Study Guide

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4. Be one step ahead

  • use distraction, distract your child from the issue causing conflict
  • develop your own tarntlu rules to avoid regular arguments

5. Give choices

  • being given choices is an important part of a child’s learning to take responsibility
  • give choices over issues that are unimportant,
  • Which of your toys do you want to take?” and “Do you want to play on the beach or go swimming?”
  • giving choices helps to defuse conflict

6. Stay in control

  • avoid being dragged into shouting matches our emotional reactions can give children a sense of power over us – like allowing them to press a “big red button” on our chests to see us react. getting angry, chasing them, getting upset
  • find a way to give realistic warnings

don’t be manipulated by your child(ren)’s shouting, whining, or tantrums

How can you stay in control of yourself when faced with bad behaviour?

 

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